The Horrors of 2023: Consecration


Let’s make this a short one. Consecration should have been my happy place: violent nuns, folk horror, and possession. But it was only muddled and confusing. There are positives – elegant acting by leads Jena Malone, Janet Suzman and Danny Huston, and some lovely, awe inspiring scenery in Scotland. The plot weaves childhood abuse, an ancient pagan cult countered by an order of pseudo-Knights Templar, and an occult possession mystery around the suicide of Jena Malone’s priest brother. As Marya E. Gates of notes, the nods to nunsploitation weakly cue Ken Russell’s The Devils. Ultimately, there exists some sort of commentary about religion, but nothing of substance comes through.

Of all the 2023 horrors I’ve taken in to date, why did it have to be the nunsploitation one that left me unimpressed?

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Choosers of the Slain!







(copyright Chillerpop)

He had a carefully styled beard, horn rimmed glasses, a beret and an affected vintage shirt, but his most notable accessory at the moment was the cheap tin fork sticking out of the back of his bloody hand.

The hipster had committed no crime other than trying to make conversation with Sister Lucretia Dismas, who was enjoying a 10 a.m. plate of cheese fries and a shot of patron accompanied by a Belgian lager. But the nun, who considered Rudy’s Bar & Grill on 44th her office, could not take his officious yammering, his thinly veiled condescension and wonder at her being a nun in a bar, his annoying opinions on fashion, film, fat people, religion, music, and his own looks, opinions she neither asked for nor engaged.

When she had enough, with reflexes born of years of fighting crime and supernatural menaces, the nun picked up her fork and put an end to his prattling. Continue reading

Stick to Your Nuns!


Sister Lucretia Dismas

October 10, 2017

(This post was originally published May 13, 2010 and is part of an ongoing serial of fiction stories about Sister Lucretia Dismas, aka the ‘Noir Nun’, a violent foul mouthed nun fighting crime and occult menaces)

Heart racing violently, tears threatening to burst forth in relief, the woman observed Sister Lucretia Dismas walking up the stairs and down the long corridor of the drab concrete hallway. As the nun strode forth in sweeping steps, her habit and robe billowed splendidly, sentient, living extensions of the holy woman’s will. Continue reading